The Origins Of Santa Claus: Fact Or Fiction?

December 10th, 2009

Santa Claus At The North Pole

Santa Claus obviously doesn’t exist in this Universe although it’s possible that he only delivers gifts to good members of the supernatural community such as white witches, good vampires, mermaids, etc.  Still the person he’s portrayed as in stories must exist in other parallel Universes as it’s a scenario that needs to be explored.  His origins could stem from the distant future in which a guy embraces the legend of Santa and eventually his persona.  He then travels back in time to the origins of the stories of old St.Nick and sets up shop at the North Pole.  He utilizes quantum replication technology to build Santa’s Village.  The same technology that will help manufacture all those millions of gifts for good little boys and girls all about the globe.  He then utilizes DNA samples to clone elves which are in fact midget like aliens from another planet.  He also clones reindeer as well with Rudolph having a special phosphorescent glowing red nose. 

I’d imagine he’d be a loner to leave his own time and come to the past to live so maybe at some point he meets Mrs.Claus while delivering gifts or helping the poor.  Maybe she was the most sainted soul he had ever met.  Someone unlike he had ever seen in his cold uncaring future where technology and entertainment trumped warm and caring relationships.  Now the magical cast of characters is complete.

Naturally Santa would utilize his artificially intelligent super computer to collect and collate the names and locations of all the children on Earth to determine whose been naughty and whose been nice.  Once the list is complete they are matched up with the letters they sent asking for gifts.  The elves are essential when it comes to sorting through all those millions of pieces of hand written barely legible paper.  They’re effort in toy production, sorting, and packing would be minimal with the quantum particle replication and assembly factory.  Still there would some things specially hand made.

On Christmas Eve the reindeer are fitted with micro anti-gravity devices controlled by Santa in his sleigh where the gifts are help in the big red bags he carries about.  All the millions of gifts have to fit in that sleigh so I’d imagine the bags contain nano computers that materialize the gifts from a storage device at the bottom of the bag in order of Santa’s delivery schedule so the completed gifts are ready to grab at the top of the bag.  His sleigh naturally would have to contain components of his time machine in order for him to deliver all those gifts in one night.  His route would have to be carefully calculated and timed to insure he never ran into himself from another time period.  Once landed on the roofs of homes or most likely hover a millimeter above them he would give the illusion of going down the chimney with a deportation device.

In another scenario who have a truly real magical Santa.  Maybe he really was real historical figure known as St.Nicolas who had been known for his secret gift giving.  Born in Turkey in 270 AD he was known as Nicolas of Myra before being made a Saint upon his death on December 7 ,346 AD.  Here we assume the original infinite God wouldn’t mess around with stuff like this so we can assume a God who was once human(see our main site) would utilize his pure thought to create Santa as pure thought is indeed what we would call magic.  Or if the Universe is contained within a quantum computer then the programmer or the AI computer itself acts as God and creates the magic of Santa through a program sort of like Neo having power in the Matrix.

St.Nick awakens after death having been resurrected by a higher power to do good upon the Earth.  Perhaps he awakens at the North Pole in his chubby red suited big white bearded Santa form in a Fortress Of Solitude where an Angel or other supernatural being instructs him about his mission.  Now imbued with immortal powers and abilities beyond that of mere mortals he fights for truth justice and the gift giving way.  Presumably it’s a supernatural reality so Santa recruits outcast Leprechauns to become his elves and imbues common reindeer with elements of his life force so they attain some of his immortal powers.  Again he probably meets Mrs.Claus on one of his journeys about the globe.

Naturally with all these gifts mysterious appearing around the world the governments of the future with their technology will begin to investigate and track down Santa.  Some such as the US government might see him as a threat because they can’t stand anyone who tries to be more powerful than them.  Luckily his magic which is of a higher supernatural power will always be far superior to any man made technology so they can never find or track him.  In the first scenario where Santa comes from future technology hundreds or even thousands of years in the future he is protected through various advanced invisibility cloaking devices and other various ingenious devices that hide him, his sleigh, and the entire North Pole City.  By the time society is so advanced that any gift can be replicated for free would be when the government could finally find him but by then he would retire as it wouldn’t make sense to give gifts anymore.  At that point all Santa’s do indeed retire or simply move to one of infinite other parallel Universes to start all over again.  Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!  Ho Ho Ho!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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